Ok, so first off, let me say that I don't easily get squeemish or nausious. A lifetime of surfing the internet will do that to you. But the topic of this blog made me gag more than once, which is saying something. The lovely topic I'd like to discuss is of course, placenta eating!
Those of you who are fortunate enough to not have experianced childbirth probably don't know what a placenta is. Don't feel bad if you don't know, its not really something that they bring up in sex ed (or if they did bring it up, it must have been the day I was having unprotected anal sex in the bathroom with a random female partner).
In any case, thanks to the magic of wikipedia I bring you this quaint definition.
The placenta is a highly vascularized organ that connects the developing fetal tissues to the uterine wall, supplying the fetus with maternal nutrients, and allowing fetal waste to be disposed of via the maternal kidneys.
The placenta is often reffered to as the "afterbirth" because it generally is "birthed" aka pushed out 'jo vagina, after the baby. Thats all well and good, its deffinatly not pretty but neither are newborn babies. Mostly they tend to look like tadpoles, something else they failed to mention in sex-ed.
Ok so there isn't any nice way to say this other than, there are people who eat human placenta.
Here is a blog of a woman who decided that the first thing that she wanted to do after giving birth was to eat a piece of her own RAW PLACENTA!
Oh and there are even people who get together for placenta eating parties!
So I can't confirm its authenticity but if you just type "placenta eating" into google your going to get a lot more hits than you may care for.
Here's my take on the subject, if a baby was still-born, would you think its ok to eat it? No, obviously not. For one, that would make you a fuckin sadistic pyschopath, two its gross. But logically whats the difference between a dead baby, essentially a piece of meat, and a placenta?
Biologically the only difference (yes I know its a big difference but bare with me) is the configuration and variaty of cells. One is not more alive than the other. Im not proposing that we eat dead babies, i'm just trying to point out that eating placenta is cannabilism.
Somehow these people have come to the conclusion that cannabilism doesnt count if the meat in question squirted out of your vagina. It didn't come from thin air, the woman's body made it. That makes you a cannibal, am I the only one that gets this?
I wonder if these people would eat tumors removed from their bodies too?
To be perfectly clear, I'm not saying that these sick fucks should stop their little human excrament soirees but don't try to pass it off as natural or healthy. Maybe if you had no other source of meat and you were starving to death it would be reasonable to eat placenta, just like it would be reasonable to resort to cannabalism. But otherwise its a disgusting and unnessecary practice and expect people to say so.
It's a mad world...
God is an incompetant prick.
I've always loved George Carlin and as I move more towards an anti-theist philosophy in my life, I love him more and more each day.
There really is credibility to the notion that if there is a God, that he must be either extremely incompetent or, more than likely, just doesn't care about us.
If you may believe that he does care, take this into consideration. If we believe what scientific evidence tells us, that the human species has been around for at least 100,000 years, and we also believe what the bible tells us (sorry to pick on Christianity at the moment but its just because i'm lazy and I don't want to get into the other major religions right now, but don't worry, their time will come) if we believe what the bible tells us, then the Lord our savior was sent to a rather secluded region of the middle east around 2000 years ago to make the world a better place. For some reason God didn't choose to send him to China or another region of the world were they has already developed a written language and word of his deeds could be carried in a precise and efficient manner to the rest of the world(the bible was written several hundred years after the death of the supposed Christ so the story was carried by the most efficient venue, word of mouth).
So we would have to come to the conclusion given this understanding that God and all of heaven stood by for 98,000 years before presenting itself to humanity or 96,000 if you count Moses. Was God just so tired from making the Universe that he slept through the emergence of the species he supposedly made in his own image? If he wasn't hung over, then why allow for the rampant genocide, murder, rape, torture, infanticide, etc. of a developing species for so long before sending the savior? Also, on a side note, what about all the other God's that people had before the Judeo-Christian one? Remember how pissed he got about the golden calf? He devoted a whole commandment to it for God sake. Why didn't he get upset when the Greek's worshiped Apollo or Aieres instead of him? Are we to believe it's because he was still being a little old testament and had chosen a specific tribe of Isreal to be his special favorite children? That's not so easy to believe if we are also to believe that he can do anything and that he loves us all.
Anyways, i don't want to make this too long, but it just strikes me as strange to imply that a supreme being, that loves us so dearly, would treat us so poorly. While we cannot prove or disprove the existence of God, I think that I can say with certainty that if he does exist, he is either vastly incompetent or supremely malicious, or potentially both.
There is no humpty dumpty and there is no God.
-George Carlin
Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog
My favorite song from a great online musical short.
Watch the whole thing here.
Peace, not literally though...
Everyone I know goes away
I don't write personal posts in my blog because to a certain extent I feel its a bit narcissistic to think that everyone really gives two shits what random thoughts I've had throughout the day. But fuck all that for now, because this is what I am. This is how I feel. And even though it sucks, I can't blame anyone but myself. And even if I could do it all differently, I wouldn't.
I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything
What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here
What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way
My professor pwns math noobs
This is my Calculus professor.
...
Yup, its going to be a rough semester.
Doesn't it look like hes trying to steal your soul with his stare? Yeah, its fuckin creepy.
Unfortunatly for him I already traded my soul for 50 bar dollars at JJ Mugs and a bag of double bubble.
In any case, with a stare like that he can probably read my mind or smell my fear or something so I'm screwed anyway.
Wish me luck.
January, you'll always be number one
So its a brand-ass-spanking new year. People are making their resolutions and I'm looking foward to watching people break them. Its not like I have a problem with resolutions in general. I can respect the idea of trying to make yourself a better person, I just dont understand why people find it necessary to choose such an arbitrary event to make them. January is the beggining of the year just as much as any other month. New Years resolutions just seem to be what cool people do when they want to feel better about themselves without actually being expected to do any real work. Of course thats just kind of an asshole mentality, but its hard not to think that when you have people who every godamned year resolve to lose 15 pounds or some other equally self centered and narcissistic perogative, unless their morbidly obese in which case thats probably a good idea considering how unhealthy it is, but when was the last time you saw a morbidly obese person resolve to lose weight? Honestly, I'd be happier if someone resolved to kiss puppies all year, yeah its equally as useless, but honestly who doesnt like puppies?
Another thing, why dont we have animal's that represent multiples of years like the Chinese? See, they know how to make years fun.
Example:
America:
What year were you born?
1988 (i.e. the year of boring)
China:
What year were you born?
The year of the fuckin dragon.
See?
However...
Of course its very likely that if the United States were ever to impliment a similar system, which is unlikely due to Americans all consuming phobia of all things Communism, Communist, the color red etc., they would run out of cool animals rather quickly.
Heres a list of likely candidates:
Year of the Bald Eagle (Yes its cliché but you know it would happen)
Year of the Buffalo (Throwing a bone to the original inhabitants of our wonderful nation)
Year of the Manatee (See I told you we'd start running out)
Now we'd just default to sports mascots
Year of the Dolphin
Year of the Bobcat
Year of the Mountain Lion (These count as two because people are stupid enough to have two names for the same animal)
I suppose it wouldnt be all that bad. I'm no Biologist and I'm probably missing a vast number of species that would be candidates for the list. Although I may change my tune if I get stuck with Year of the Beaver.
Happy New Year everyone :D
